Bloed aan die kosyne

"As die Here verbykom om die Egiptenaars te tref, sal Hy die bloed aan die bokant en die sykante van die deurkosyn sien en die deur oorslaan. Hy sal nie die dood in julle huise laat kom om julle te tref nie."
Eksodus 12:23

Ons almal beleef moeilike tye. Tye waar jy voor uitdagings staan wat eenvoudig die vertroue wat jy in jou eie kragte het, in twyfel trek. Dit kan 'n uitdaging wees, 'n beproewing, 'n toets van jou integriteit. Maak nie saak wat nie, tye kom waarin jy skaakmat voel - daar is nie meer beweegruimte nie.
Soos 'n bees in 'n drukgang weet jy, hier moet jy deur, sonder omdraaikans moet jy voortbeur om weer anderkant uit te kom.

Dit was voor een van sulke uitdagings wat ek nou die dag  te staan gekom het. Ek was in afwagting - die volgende op 'n lysie om te hoor of 'n projek waaraan ek al baie lank gewerk het, uiteindelik goedgekeur gaan word. Ek het geweet, sou dit hierdie keer weer afgekeur word, sal ek diep moet delf om hiermee te kan aangaan.

Dit was asof my gedagtes by moed verloor se vlakte wou-wou draai. Wat doen mens dan? Instinktief het ek my oë na bo gedraai - die Woord sê  nie verniet hef jou oë op na die berge nie, so sal ons vra: waar kom ons hulp vandaan?
Tot my verwondering staar ek myself vas in bloedrooigeverfde waterpype wat al teen die plafon afloop. Ongelooflik! In my gees kom die Here in daardie oomblik met die beeld van die Israeliete wat wag om bevry te word uit Egipte.
Die bloed aan die kosyne van hulle huise was al wat hulle kon red van die verdoemenis wat die doodsengel sou bring.

Terwyl ek daar sit en wag op my uitdaging het ek besef: die bloed van Jesus is altyd bo-oor my deurkosyn gesmeer, elke oomblik van die dag. Dit is daar met elke asemteug wat ek neem. En die wonder daarvan is, dit is genoeg. Want daardeur het ek lewe, ware lewe en wanneer ek voor enige uitdaging staan wat groter as ek is, is daar niks anders wat ware bevryding sal bring as juis daardie bloed nie.

Hier en Nou

Om teenwoordig te wees - dit is 'n lewenskuns. So veel kere is mens net 'n suurstofdief, 'n koolstofdioksiedfabriek. Dit is 'n kuns om in die hede te leef:

•  Sonder om terug te hunker na die verlede. Die verlede bou ons huidige ervarings. Dis is 'n grondslag vir besluite wat ons in die hede neem, maar die oomblik wat ons daar bly leef word ons 'n langspeelplaat wat vasgehak, nutteloos op die draaitafel roteer. Ons bly oor en oor dieselfde deuntjies speel. Ons timmer aan ou gedagtes terwyl die huisie reeds lankal gesloop moes word. Die gehiem is om die herinneringssand deur te sif en een vir een die diamante van onthou eenkant te sit. Om hulle te laat monteer en, terwyl jy die hede vier en geniet hulle om jou hals te dra. 'n Verlede wat stof opgaar en net uitehaal word om in tye van heimwee na te kyk is 'n vermorsing van herinneringsgeleenthede.
• Dit is 'n kuns om in die hede te leef. Sonder om vooruit te spring, aanhoudend die toekoms in. Die hede is die toekoms waaroor jy so gedroom het. Jy sal nooit die toekoms kan in nie. 99% van die dinge wat gebeur met ons is onbeplan. Die gehiem is om verantwoordelik te leef. Elke dag aan jou drome te bou stukkie vir stukkie. Sonder om bewustelik daaraan te dink dat jy besig is met die toekoms - want dan sorg die toekoms klaar vir homself.

Ek wil nie meer jaag nie. Laat die oomblik homself afsluit.

Ek wil nie meer op 'n ander plek wees as hier nie. Die omgewing moet met my kan begin praat en iets van homself aan my gee.

Ek wil meer luister, meer dink, meer lug, meer proe, meer kaalvoet loop, meer laat gaan...

Ek wil besig wees met die oomblik, my volle aandag gee aan wat nou gebeur, want dan kan alles ontvou en ke kan aanbeweeg sonder hunkering. Hundering na wat was, maar ook na dit wat nog moet kom.

Cowtrain

"Every child comes into the world with the message that God does not yet despair of man'"
Tagore


Experiences are flagged in the mind and tagged. Some labeled pleasant and beautiful find their way and get stored away together, ready for collection and reflection on long winters evenings where the warmth of memories provide a welcome fire.
Others are boxed and tagged as comical, where its release into the realm of the conscious instinctively draws a smile onto one's face.
Their are the sad ones that we try to hide in the attic of the subconscious, trying to forget that they have ever entered through our lives.


But then there are those experiences that you cannot name. They simply do not fall into any category.
They are all pleasant, all special, some even extraordinary, but it would simply be unfair to try and categorise them.
I find that most of these experiences come from observing and interacting with children.


This past Sunday we had a family outing (literally). We went for a ride on the Gautrain. This practical and efficient mode of transport, aimed at relieving our roads of  its traffic load and providing the working population with some hope midst the never ending traffic despair, has also become an amusement tool.
We were not alone in our idea. We were surrounded by hundreds other families, ready for a day of pleasure in Sandton (I am proud to say that we were not the only family taking photos of our excursion).


The train ride was pleasant. We landed opposite to a mother with a little girl of around 3 years old on her lap. Inevitably, in the relaxed mood and unlike on underground services in Europe, we started conversing with the mother.
"Is this you first Gautrain experience?"
Looking at the excitement on the little girl's face we expected it to be the first.
Surprisingly the answer was no. 
They have done this before. Yes, many times and she loves the "Cowtrain" as she calls it.


I realised this when we arrived at the Marlboro station and her eyes doubled in size as she was informing us that we will be going through the tunnel now. She new every step of the way.


Upon our arrival at Sandton she did not want to climb off. She did not see any need for breakfast, just wanted the ride back.


Suddenly I understood what Jesus meant when He said that  He wants us to believe in him like children do. Every day our relationship, our faith, our devotion to Him should fill us with excitement and awe. It should be as if we start each day fresh, as if we have interaction with Him for the first time. And when we come to the end of the day we should long to be close to Him all over again.


He wants us to climb on the "Cowtrain" every day seizing every moment, living as if it is our first and last day ever. Enjoy the ride. Who knows you might be buying your last ticket tomorrow.

Rooiwyn

"In wine there is wisdom,
In beer there is freedom,
In water there is bacteria."
Ben Franklin


Opgedra aan Karlien: My partner in crime...


Niemand word gebore met 'n liefde vir wyn nie. Die fermentasieproses maak die vreugdes van sy genietinge veel later eers aan die mensdom bekend. Soos 'n mens die lewe leerken, so leerken mens ook die wysheid wat wyn bring.
Ongelukkig is soveel van ons eerste bekendmakings met die voggies van die gode dikwels tydens onbesonne studente oomblikke, wanneer jy niks beter as Tassenberg of bokswyn kan bekostig nie. Met die gevolg, dat wyn se reputasie dikwels besoedel word deur die nadors wat 'n oormaat goedkoopwyn die volgende oggend vergesel. Die Afrikaanse musiekbedryf het ook nie veel gedoen om rooiwyn se beeld te versterk nie - ek he beslis geen behoefte om 'n harlekyn te wees of myself tot rooiwyn te wend in oomblikke van seer of traan of pyn nie.


So loop ons vir jare rond, ontneem van die diepere geheime wat rooiwyn inhou. Al wat jy oor jou tong laat is koeldrankwyn (party noem dit Late Harvest) en 'n slukkie nagmaalswyn (van wanneer af is Old Brown Sherry wyn?), want rooiwyn is sleg...


Jare later sou ek eers leer dat elke wyn sy eie storie het om te vertel. Die storie van sy herkoms, sy groei en ontwikkeling tot die karakter wat hy uiteindelik in jou glas openbaar. 'n Proses wat etlike jare kan neem om te voltooi. Elke slukkie wyn skryf sy outobiografie oor jou tong heen.




Elke wyn het inderdaad sy eie wysheid om te openbaar, maar jy leer ook soos die tyd aanstap dat goeie smaak nie oornag ontwikkel nie. Alles wat die moeite werd is neem tyd. En net soos wyn met tyd meer en meer van sy wysheid aan jou openbaar, so moet die mens ook oor jare heen fermenteer om uiteindelik as bron van wysheid in die glas van die lewe geskink te word.


Dit neem tyd om die taal van wyn te leer verstaan. Maar wanneer jou tong eers geleer het oom die klanke in elke wynnuanse in te neem, om elke wyn toe te laat om sy storie onvoorwaardelik te vertel, eers dan sal jy weet waar wyn sy wysheid gaan haal.


Prost - Klink 'n glasie op rooiwyn!

Genade

Ek het al soveel keer gewens ek kan God se genade volkome begryp. Ek weet dat alles wat ek het, dit wie ek is alles net genade is. Ek kan niks verdien nie, op niks aanspraak maak nie. Maar ten spyte van hierdie besef vang ek myself keer op keer besig om myself met ander te vergelyk. Ek kyk meestal in my binneste na die wat meer as ek bereik het, meer vakansie kan hou, geld in die water kan gooi en nogsteeds sonder begrotings leef, minder bekommernisse as ek het (en ja ons honde het al onder hulle getel).


Maar na elke vergelykingsessie voel ek leeg van binne, voel ek hoe die onvergenoegdhede nog 'n paar plooie om my mondhoeke uitkerf. Met elke vergelyking gooi ek God se genade terug in sys gesig.


Een aand ry ek en Mario na 'n restaurant. By een van die robotte vang my oog 'n boemelaarvrou wat vooroor sit, haar bokshuisie haar enigste beskerming teen die snerpende wind. Ek het haar al voorheen by die robot gesien sit maar daardie aand, terwyl ek uitgevat in 'n nuwe rok, met Pleasures parfuum agter my ore en my hand op my man se been, by haar verby ry het die kontras my reg op die voorkop getref.
Dit kon ek gewees het. Ek kon in 'n bokshuisie gebly het. Ek kon elke dag gewonder het waar die kos vandag vandaan gaan kom. Dit kon ek gewees het wat elke dag aan die aalmoese van ander langs 'n besige pad oorgelaat word.


Hoekom het ek soveel meer? Hoekom word ek omring deur liefde, vriende, warmte, geleenthede? Hoekom het ek 'n huis, 'n kar, kos, vakansies - te veel om op te doen. Ek weet nie maar dit is juis hoe genade werk. Dit is genade omdat dit onbegryplik is.
God se genade kan nie verstaan word nie. Ek sal nooit kan verstaan hoekom Hy besluit het om Jesus te stuur om my, 'n sondaar wat nooit ooit eers iets kan doen om hom tevrede te stel, te red nie.


Maar een ding weet ek: ek kan dankbaar wees. Dankbaar wees in my denke, my  woorde, in my doen aan ander mense. Ons moet dankbaar wees - want hoe sal ons ooit kan verstaan?

Living for tomorrow

How will I know that I will be able to withstand the challenges tomorrow might bring? How will I know if I will be able to withstand the test of trial and tribulation that time may throw at my doorstep?


The answer lies in the way we live today. Everyday is a building block paving our attitude and stamina for the day to come. Philip Brooks said: "Some day, in years to come, you will be wrestling with the great temptation, or trembling under the great sorrow of your life. But the real struggle is here, now... Now it is being decided whether in the day of your supreme sorrow or temptation you shall miserably fail or gloriously conquer. Character cannot be made except by a steady, long continued process."


There is no quick fix. Every choice I make today becomes a funnel along which I will direct choices of similar nature in future. The time I spend on reflection and prayer streamlines my thoughts, moulds it into a useful piece of equipment which I will be able to use to sift through sorrow and pain to find the gems in everything that crosses my path.


Character cannot be build in one day. It is a multi layered process. Each event in your life lays down a sediment of experience. The process is continuous. When the investments are made frequently and abundantly the credit will be available for utilisation in times of need.


Always live responsibly today with the end in mind.

Run

Run. We all know the word, we are all familiar with the action. We see sportsmen running after balls in different shapes and sizes. We marvel at the swift running of a gazelle over an open field. We listen to the smooth running of an expensive car and wish that we could be driving to work with that running sound in our ears. We know running.

I searched for a dictionary definition that would describe running in such a way that I would be able to identify with the term and here it is:
"To move swiftly on foot so that both feet leave the ground during each strike."
I took two things from  this definition. Running should always be a swift movement - there should be a certain amount of grace attached to if. Secondly, the moment your foot leaves the ground completely, you are running - interesting thought.

We are all running each day, and by that I do not mean literally running. Yes, some of us who are more disciplined does put our Nike's on and do a few kilometers. But even those of us who are more lazy know what it means to run.
So often we have to run through each day to get everything done. We run to meetings, try and run through traffic, we run our children to school, we run through to do lists in our brain. There are just so many things we have to run through. And slowly but surely we are not performing a swift action anymore. The running becomes more of a struggling motion.

This world is made for running. We know the feeling when you are so busy that it feels you are not touching the ground. Back to our definition it makes sense - when you are running you are practically in mid air most of the time.

My problem is not with running. It is a reality - I do not think we will be able to change the world overnight into a calmer, wheelchair friendly world.

But what can we change, to bring some serenity into our lives. How do we keep the daily running process swift? The secret lies in where we are running to.
You have to have an endpoint. The danger of exhaustion, of landing in the rat race arises the moment when we do not have anywhere to run to.
The moment the endpoint becomes undefined we loose our focus, we loose hope.
Some of us are running towards success, believing that the true answer lies in achievement. Others prefer to run to pleasure at the end of a busy day. Yet others run to their families.
All of these are valid places to run to, no problem. But what if those are taken away? What if the goal posts shift?

I kept on running, searching for answers. Then it came to me- Hebrew 12:1-2 - Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

Let us fix our eyes on Jesus and run to him. Let him be our motivator, our strength to finish the race. With him as our focus we will not get tired, we will not run an aimless race and most of all we will lift our feet completely off the ground with grace and swiftness.